To Ground in Uncertainty
Most of us have a complicated relationship with uncertainty. It's often tied to the future — the unknown, the uncontrollable, the parts of life we can’t predict. As we transition from childhood to adulthood, this uncertainty can feel overwhelming. As children, we long for freedom, eager to grow up and step into the world, unaware that our so-called "boredom" existed within a cocoon of relative certainty.
Then suddenly, we’re thrust into the unknown — where to live, who our friends will be, whether our relationships will last, what our careers will become. It feels like everything is up in the air, and that sense of instability can be deeply unsettling. It can feel endless, like we’re constantly grasping for something solid to hold onto.
Eventually, we begin to realise: uncertainty isn’t something we outgrow or escape. It's a constant. A lifelong companion. As the saying goes, change is inevitable — no matter how anchored or secure we feel, life will keep shifting. That’s just part of being alive.
So, the question becomes: how do we feel more grounded in the midst of uncertainty? How do we stop clinging to outcomes, stop fearing what might or might not happen, stop trying to prepare ourselves for every possible “what if”?
There’s no simple answer. And maybe that’s the point. If life came with a map, if every step and surprise was laid out for us — would we want that? If someone could tell you exactly how your life would unfold, every detail mapped out with no room for surprise — would you really want to know?
Probably not.
Because this is the magic and mystery of being human. Yes, uncertainty can be terrifying. Not knowing can be painful. Change can hurt. But it can also be beautiful. Surprising. Transformative.
The challenge — and the invitation — is to build a relationship with uncertainty itself. To see it not as the enemy, but as a part of what makes life meaningful. Instead of trying to eliminate it, we learn to live with it, even embrace it. That’s where real peace begins.
Create a List of When The Uncertainty of Your Life Was a Beautiful Thing
This is the first part, and you can continue to add to it. Becoming aware of when uncertainty actually was a beautiful thing, that it created parts of your life beyond your imagination. Become aware of the times where you wouldn’t have wished it was any other way.
Create a List of Times When Uncertainty Turned Out To Be A Hard Journey
This is the second list, whilst it isn’t as easy to write, writing out times when what happened was incredibly hard, that you couldn’t have predicted it, that it was so hard that your body now clings to the fear of anything uncertain, any change. Take time to note down how you dealt with it, how you held yourself, how you grew.
Create an Uncertainty Toolkit
This toolkit can be ever changing, but having an idea of what can help bring you a little joy in times of instability can help you feel a little more grounded. What helps in times of uncertainty and change, a massage, taking yourself on a long walk, going to a class, sitting in a coffee shop and reading your book, cooking a beautiful meal. Take time to write these down, these can be your small anchors to help you come back to you.
Really Get To Know Yourself
This is easier said than done, and can’t be an answer for every problem, however really understanding who you truly are, at your core, whilst allowing for fluctuations, growth and evolution, will help you navigate the complexity of change. When you are able to navigate uncertainty with more of an awereness of who you are, what grounds you, your downfalls, your triggers, the parts of life that right now do anchor you, it becomes easier to navigate change. Because you aren’t doing it alone, you are not disconnected, you are there, with yourself, the whole way. There is something about this that makes it a little bit easier.
Sit with The Feeling of Uncertainty
Really sitting with what you are feeling uncertain about, what you are fearing, when you take time to bring this to the front of your mind, it often can feel less scary, it is the running away, the inconsistent thinking about it, that sometimes makes it bigger than it is, sit with the feeling that you are terrified of, if you are able to sit with it, ask yourself these questions if you can.
Is the feeling I am feeling towards the uncertantiny completley true, is the outcome I am so scared of, definitely going to happen.
Is there a narrative that I can start to bring in gently
What might happen if I start to bring in a new narrative alongside the fear, hold onto them together rather than just be terrified of the worst outcome happening?
